Three steps to Happiness.

I am in the middle of reading a book by Donald Miller titled, "Searching for God knows what". I have read this book before, but recently found it while cleaning my truck out yesterday.

In it, he talks about self help books and how we as a people looks for simple steps to making our lives better: AA with their twelve steps, three steps to better prayer... so on and so forth. He goes on to talk about how we react when these steps dont work out. I know that more than once I look at God, and tell Him, "I did A, B, and C, so you should at least do D for me." But it doesn't work that way.

All too often I look at God as a wish list.

As an example: I ran into (not literally) an old girlfriend today. It wasn't awkward at all. I was simply singing in my truck with the windows rolled down, and she was staring at me like I was crazy. At first I didn't recognize her, I mean, after all, I usually get girls staring at me (like Im crazy), but then it hit. Not only did I know this girl, but we used to be really close (obviously).

I remember when we broke up. It was really hard for me. To go from something that seemed so right six months before to no longer talking was a tough pill to swallow. I remember bargaining with God, telling him that I would be a better son if He would bring her back. I tried reading my bible, I tried praying, heck, I even joined a small group. I may have done all of this for the wrong reasons, but God knew that. I had tried my three or four step process to get what I wanted, and it didn't work.

Even now, I sometimes have problems with the, "God, you do this for me, and ill do this for you." statement. Loving God for God is not always easy for me. I will lay in bed and pray at night that God will show me what he wants from me, so I can be a better son. He usually listens, but rarely responds to that statement. I know I have seen God as a means to get what I want in the past, and am trying to see it differently now.

I guess the greatest thing about it is that God knows what is best for me. He knows what ultimate happiness is. I honestly dont think that while Jesus was on this earth, he was sharing three steps to happiness. If he was, what a way to end; allow the Romans to torture and crucify you.. Then you will be ultimately happy. But, isn't that what it is all about. don't we live our lives to give them up for the glory of God?

When life is hard for me, I find that worship songs help me. I can lay in bed and sing to myself, or I can scream them at the top of my lungs in the truck. This morning in church, we sang, "Not to us, but to YOUR name be the glory". It really isn't about me, but it is about God. There are times when I get ticked at him, but I find my best times are in fellowship with Him or His followers.

I know this may have been some rambling, but I hope you see the point, and ultimately are challenged to look at God for God instead of a list of what you want.

Peace out Napoleon...